Resistance Is Futile

Life happens, that’s a fact. No matter how spiritual we are, no matter the kind of relationship we feel we have with the creator, sooner or later, challenges come up that we have to face. We live in a world where we do not only have our free will, but everyone’s free will.

There is a collective unconscious, and a collective Karma, as well as our own. We also have the lessons we agreed to learn before we incarnated into this life. And then the choices we have made – whether they were wise choices or not. There is cause and effect.

Sooner or later something will happen and we might feel like everything we have worked towards, all we have learned, is lost. We feel lost, we feel scared, angry, confused, hopeless. These feelings are natural of course, and then when we feel them we feel that we are back at square one.

We may feel that we have reached a stage where we “deserve” not to encounter such inconveniences again. I for one, when something like this happens, crumble for a moment. You are likely to find me, sat on the kitchen floor like a child, melting into tears. Expressing my anger and disappointment for a few moments. Letting the tide of emotion wash over me. Resistance is futile. The feelings are real. You can’t stuff them down. They will come again as illness in your body. As dis – ease. Neither can you find solutions when filled with the tension of these feelings.
You have to sit with them for a while. This is just one example.

Life is a rollercoaster. There are things outside of ourselves that we have no control over. War machines, bankruptcy of the companies we work for, car accidents, earthquakes. We can’t control other people’s choices or behaviours, we can’t control the forces of Mother Nature.
Resistance is futile. These things will happen no matter how evolved we are as individuals, at least until the whole world evolves.

If resistance is futile, and all of these things are out of our control, then what is in our control? Who is the one constant in our lives? We are. You are. You are the person that you will have known the longest in your life. You are the person with whom you are in relationship ALWAYS.

This is where the strength lies. I have been on a rollercoaster these last two years, of joy and sadness, of scary learning and empowering learning. What I have been crafting most is my relationship with myself. I have been learning how I tick on a much deeper level, and trust myself now. I am my own best friend, and I like who I am. In fact, sometimes, I think I’m a pretty cool person. It’s taken a lot of work. I know now that, no matter what happens, I will survive, learn and grow. I know how to get back on my throne when I get knocked off, as the Queen, the Goddess of my own life. Granted, I won’t enjoy it when these lessons come around, when life does a 360 on me, who would?

The time to cultivate this self-knowledge, and the tools and habits to help oneself get back on one’s throne, is when everything is going well. It takes work and discipline, but discipline in a beautiful way. Discipline is controlling your thoughts and words in order to cultivate unconditional love for oneself, to cultivate your life purpose, your dreams, and the ability to listen to and to know you deserve what you need at any given time.

Over the coming months I will be sharing tools and practices that can help to build this throne and to keep you on it, but there are two tools that I have always advocated that you can start right now.

1) Writing a journal – Yes I know. I am always harping on about self-awareness. But really, if you don’t understand who you really are and what makes you tick, what makes you stronger, then how can you make the most life affirming choices? Do yourself a favour – go to a bookstore or stationers and treat yourself to beautiful notebook or diary, one that inspires you to spend time with it. Maybe even a pen or two in your favourite colour. Write in it or draw in it at least three times a week. Your thoughts, feelings and experiences. Your dreams for the future.

2) Meditation – at least 15 minutes a day. You can listen to your breath, or say a mantra or repeat an affirmation, or even listen to a guided meditation. You can find plenty of free guided meditations online or even download one onto your device for your convenience. This will help you to develop the skill of listening to yourself, of presence and being mindful and accepting of what is happening in the present moment. It gives your body time to rejuvenate and slow down as well. It’s a win – win really, isn’t it?

I would love to hear your own thoughts and experiences – please feel free to share with me. Also, watch this space for details on how to receive practical tools and tips for developing your relationship with yourself, and how never to miss a blog again.

Wishing you love, and Angel blessings,

Lucy Loizou

The Truth about Happily Ever After.

The run up to my birthday this year has brought on some serious self reflection. I am about to become 37. Another three years and I will be 40. I never thought my age would bother me, but I have come to the realisation that somewhere, in the back of my mind, 40 is my adult number. The age at which I am to have it altogether, to have achieved my success, whatever that would look like. When I realised I had three more years to reach this age, I started to realise that maybe, just maybe, I won’t live forever. I started to see my life as a timeline. Going back to the beginning and reliving moments, reliving times when I was just existing, relaxing, playing. Reliving times when I limited myself, not realising my right to be here, my right to be happy in my own way. Living a life of people pleasing and thinking that other people knew more than me and I was obligated to listen to their advice more than my own.

My exact thought was, shouldn’t I be well on my way to my own Happily Ever After by now? Shouldn’t I be sorted? We live a life of expecting this state of being sorted – knowing who we are, the perfect relationship, career, family, home, so that we don’t have to worry about it anymore. A stage of stasis, It is perpetuated by children’s fairy tales, by the movies, and cartoons. Happily Ever After, and that is where the story ends.

What happened to Snow White, Sleeping Beauty – after the wedding? After the story ends? Is that the end of their yearning? Their sole purpose in life?

You might think I’m being cynical, but in this earthly life, in our time here, there is no happy ever after. There might be happier ever after, or pretending to be happy after after. But things don’t just stop once you find the perfect career, the perfect home, the perfect family, friends or social status. Well, – correction, for some people it does stop there, but not just because of some unforeseen illness or sudden death, but because they hold on to that space in time in a death grip that prevents them from growing and learning.

The truth is, Sleeping Beauty, five years into her relationship with the prince, probably discovered that her relationship needed work and went into journalling to or therapy, in order to learn how to communicate with him better. I mean, after sleeping all of those years, one would think that she needed space to find herself, to find out who she really is, and what she wants to do with her life. The prince may have though, goodness, who is this person that I woke up with a kiss? I love her dearly but I do long for another adventure – I want to rescue someone. You see?

The truth is, we are here to evolve and learn throughout our lives. Yes it feels great to reach a goal. Yes it feels great to reach a clearer understanding of yourself and life so far. But no, it doesn’t you mean you should risk changing everything you have accomplished for the chance of something that could be even more fulfilling for you. That you shouldn’t leave your place and level of learning, you shouldn’t challenge your outlook and ideals of life again. Life without change, life without growth, is stagnation. Is death. Slow, painful, soul – destroying death.

As we learn, as we grow, we change. We understand ourselves better. We get Divine guidance to work on new projects, meet new people. These yearnings, though they might feel scary, should be tested out and considered, not just ignored so we can stay in our comfort zone.

Please always stay open and listen to those beautiful inner whisperings, calling you to learn something new. Some new skill, some different way of being or a new healthier habit. Be open to the new friends that come your way, the new experiences and opportunities that the universe brings to you. If you listen to your inner voice, and check it with common sense and a good plan, setting your intention and taking daily action, you will be living a life, not just existing one.

So, why don’t you write a list of all of the ideas and thoughts of your inner whisperings? Write a journal, draw pictures or talk to a trusted friend about the new things you are learning about yourself, and choose which actions you feel would be the best to take on next.

Love and Blessings,
Lucy Loizou.